What a week! :-(

JAUNDICE. yup.. on baby lanner's 5th day i noticed he's really yellow (bes had a bit of yellow but it was nothing so i assumed the same. lesson one: NEVER assume.) and he was startin to get some white spots.. again i though it's just a rash... just to be on the safe side, i packed the girls (nanny n bes) into the car n drove to the kids' clinic, dr terry. she took one look at lanner n said we had to run a blood test asap. looked serious. within 2 hrs (4pm) i was at... where else... the dreaded LIKAS hospital.. where i spent 4 days of torture after besra was born, and where the week before this they practically ignored me in the emergency unit where i was in pain for 1.5hrs and the damn doctor gave me a hell of a time until i walked out. needless to say, not many fond memories at likas.

anyway, this time they were a bit quicker to act. baby's jaundice level was 550 which is really high if u consider 280 is the danger level where they put the child under the photo (UV light) machine. they managed to f(*& up the drip which was supposed to bring the level down. martin was mega pissed off with them but they said, they were already doin their best. when they finally got the drip going, baby's level was 611 and hadnt dropped. so they went ahead with a full blood transfusion 480ml, 2 cycles of lanner's blood circulation which took abt 3 hrs. by 1am the level was down to 280. lanner didnt cry (in fact he seldom cries) and he seems none the wiser considering the trauma it really was but i guess that's the magic of being a baby. only the mommies n daddies suffer n shed tears of 'what ifs'.

over the next 7 days, i was again a prisoner of likas hospital, cos they had to complete 7 days of antibiotics to make sure there is no infection in lanner's blood. i should really be more grateful to the hospital and their staff instead of complaining all the time. ok, as of this second, i'm a changed person. i will stop harping on their faults and just be thankful for the good that came out of it. Lanner is well n safe and they did try their best. ;-)

i've missed my home and my daughter soooooo much over the last week. and although my fortune teller once said i'll have two sons n a girl, i think i will consciously stop at two. if i have another one the risk of premature birth is astronomically high.. and with it brings even more health risks. i'm seriously not going to put any more lives in danger cos it just pulls too hard on my emotional strings.. dont think i can bear it if anything bad happens. fingers crossed.

lanner is such a joy to look after. he cries very lil, the doc says cos he's comfortable n that i shouldn't worry. he cried today when i bathed him, so that's a relief. ;-) he just drinks his milk every 3 hrs, has a pee n a poop n goes back to sleep. n the cycle repeats itself. i think with besra i didnt really enjoy the first few months because being a new mother you're always second guessing yourself, trying to assess if you're doing the right thing at the right time. with this second one, i'm more relaxed and i really take the time to just enjoy the experience.

who does he look like? hehe a bit like besra but with smaller eyes, still double eyelids but noticeable smaller. same nose as besra and mouth, but a distinctively missing chin. lol.. dark brown hair n eyes are gray blue right now just like besra's was but eventually it will turn brown, dont ask me why.. i dunno. he's adorable. martin is away at a very important fishing competition right now and he took the camera with him so no pics, the only pic i have on computer is one a friend (thanks allen!) took while he was in the warmer just after he was born on 17th april. will flood the blog with close up shots soon, i promise. anyway, just glad that all is well in the wiles household now. there is no place like home! hugs for all the smses n calls n well wishes... so nice to know that plenty of people out there care. kiss kiss!